Entries for October, 2004

October 3rd, 2004
how....fitting.
bletz @ 10:30 AM
Peep



Your a marshmallow peep! You look cute, but in truth, you are full of hate. Behind your beady chocolate eyes are a torrent of evil thoughts. You hate the world for biting off the soft marshmellow heads of your comrads. Most people think your inocent and sweet, but there are few who know zee truth behind your yellow and pink sugar coating.



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October 4th, 2004
two summers and counting...
bletz @ 01:10 PM
We met two summers ago. And back then, you were nothing to me. Now, two years later, you have become a seemingly-permanent (but-hopefully-not) installation in my mind.

You were just some guy with gelled-up hair. What made you any different? Up to now, I can’t be certain. Maybe it was your awkwardness that got my attention. Maybe it was the challenge of seeing SOME emotion in your eyes. Or maybe only my outrageous teenage hormones are to blame. I can’t be certain, just as I can’t be certain who you really are. Who are you? Do I even know you at all? Do you know me? DO we REALLY know each other? There are moments when I see the flash of recognition in your eyes. I feel a spark of hope that we really DO know each other. But the moment passes. Too quickly.
And we’re back to being the strangers that we are. Will we ever really know each other?

We met two summers ago. And now, you’re in my every thought, running through my head.

[ now for wrath ]

October 19th, 2004
when the heart contradicts the mind.
bletz @ 01:34 PM
i don't know why but i get the oddest feeling just to know that you're there. cheesy, i know. i abhor myself for feeling this way. as much as words of hate and scorn and expressions of dislike come forth from my lips, inside....i am singing an entirely different tune. ENTIRELY, it's not even funny. -siGhs- who are you who plagues my every waking moment? what right have you to disturb my thoughts every other minute? who are you to deserve all the attention
i'm paying you? all the angst i am forced to endure because of you? who are you to warrant almost my everything when you don't even know i exist?

another excerpt to fit my pathetic situation:

"When he was angry with her, it made her feel awful in a way that had nothing to do with fear, but it was still better than when he looked at her as if she wasn't there at all. She would never be the girl he loved, but at least if she became the girl he hated, he would not remain indifferent to her. Surely being something--even
something bad--was better than being nothing at all."

[ 1 now for ruin ]

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